Saturday, 10 July 2010

'Better than the truth because as big as you can think.'

- John Crowley

I know I've been lazy lately, just using this as a dump for gnomic utterances scissored out of other people's words. I've been taking on ridiculous amounts of work, good (rewriting the manuscript of a book about cutting domestic energy usage), bad (writing articles about asphalt) and ugly (creating a site that has to look like this atrocity). I was ill for a while and I'm still kind of run down, I'm spreading myself pretty thin and I haven't had a proper break since that fateful day in November 2008 when I was hurled up screaming from the abyss by a jealous adversary. I've been playing bass for a friend's band for about a year and our rehearsal schedule is stepping up as we prepare to finally record. I've been dealing with severe pangs of depression, self-doubt and self-loathing as magazine after magazine rejects the best story I've ever written. I'm trying to find the courage to pour blood and sweat into a new batch of stories that may be as good as the one that no one wants (hah!), only it won't work unless I let it bleed. I've hardly had time to even read in the last couple of months as a glance at my 'Books Read in 2010' sidebar will show.

In short, I'm cracking up.

And yet, I have plans. Big plans. Stay tuned for some/more.

1 comment:

M.R.M. said...

Don't crack up! I'm still committed to some of the big plans you mentioned. Stay strong, and I'm pleased (though not surprised) that you're busy. As for the story, I can't say that I haven't ever felt the same way, but I just shrug and say, "next!" Cheap comfort, I know, but the world will marvel at your brilliance, my friend. They'll kick themselves for not getting on the Japey bandwagon sooner.